The Thanksgiving That Never Was

------------------------Mama Michael and Michael----------------------------------------
-------------------The new name the nurses have given me----------------------------- Friends
This title may seem a bit misleading but ,in truth,I did miss Thanksgiving altogether. You see I am the only American Missionary in Kisoro and I thought Thanksgiving was always the last Thur. in November, not the fourth (which is usually the last, but not this time). Anyway, Thur. is my day off so I went to Kisoro and shopped and spent several wasted hours on the Internet as it all disappeared before my very eyes. I did hear young visiting Americans speak of Thanksgiving but thought they were referring to next week.
I arrived home at 8 pm and received a wonderful phone call from all my fellow missionaries in Nychbale (several hours away) wishing me a "Happy Thanksgiving!"
When I realized they were not joking, I laughed myself to sleep thinking of my parents in the heavens who ,I imagined, were also laughing at my mistake.
But don't cry for me Argentina or anywhere else for that matter, as I will celebrate my Turkey Day on sunday the 26th , only I'll cook chicken and have Baby Michael with me all day (in my own home). Also Fr. John will join me for dinner, so it should be a lovely, if not unusual, Thanksgiving day for me.
This Blog is a letter I started to my friend Mary Johns in AZ. and soon realized it contained stories you all might enjoy about my life in Uganda.
I am thankful for each one of you who is reading this Blog
Marie
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Dear Mary November 22, 2007
I was so happy to receive your email, not hearing from you is disconcerting for me.
Somehow you are a link for me between “all my worlds” and when I don’t hear from you I get them all mixed up and make stupid decisions or get off balance (have you a clue what a “glue” you are for me?)
So much to say that I really wish I could talk to you. Instead of sending another package call Carol or Carolyn and ask how to get “One Suite “ phone minutes, so I can hear your voice.
Let’s see: Teresa Wilson is gravely ill with that very fast growing Breast Cancer. I am not sure why you couldn’t get her site but I’ll try to forward Rebecca’s email with the web site on it www.teresasjourney.com Actually , I think you should be able to just click on it from my email, try it. The concert was Nov 10th and an auction Nov 11th. Rebecca seems to be spending most of her time in AZ. with her Mom. It is very sad, no one deserves it less than Teresa, the epitome of healthy living and living a Faith filled life.
Then Dr. Gladys daughter, Bobs sister, Analea, died from breast cancer the 18th of this month. She ,Teresa and my friend Lynn were all diagnosed about the same time.
-------Lynn is doing great! Her bags are packed and she would be here in a millisecond if life allowed. I am not depending on them coming for my survival, rather looking at the future possibility as a huge gift from God. I just can’t see it, but then I can’t ‘see” a lot of things these days.
My life is soooo full! Michael takes up a lot of my “spare” time and most of my heart. I try to feed him 2 or 3 times a day. Most of the nurses are great, have named me “Mama Michael” but a couple seem annoyed by my presence. Also the nursing students (which practically run the hospital) are , again, mostly good but some hover around me and Michael, ignoring the other sick preemie babies. Sometimes I want to scream “Do you know what claustrophobia is?” Yesterday the electrician came in the Nursery to change light bulbs: We’ll he uses a ladder (unstable) and it is very crowded in there . I was worried about the other two preemies who might have something fall on them etc., as I was holding Michael and protecting him. I said to the “hovering” students ”Your first concern should be those two babies, make sure they are safe” They smiled and didn’t move. I said” Do you not understand what I am saying, should I say it another way?” They said “you said we should protect the two babies” I said “yes, so why don’t you do that?” They just smiled and continued to hover! Finally the electrician himself ask for their help to move the isolates for safety, which they reluctantly did. It all worked out alright, but I wanted to scream!!
Michael weighs 1.8 kg now x 2.2 = 3.6 lbs and is 4 months old! He is strong and amazingly healthy and though strong willed (need to be to survive) is a gentle little soul. I really don’t know what will happen in his future. I try to give him and the situation to God every night and pick it up, again, in the morning. I, Mama Marie, would take him temporarily or permanently in a millisecond, but. I want what is best for Michael, not my heart or my ego., that is why I keep giving it to God.
We did get permission from the grandmother to baptize him, so one way or the other I’ll be his godmother. I am hoping Cynthia can find the Christening outfit worn by my sister Theresa some 53 years ago and Heather and many other babies over the years. I had it in a frame, hanging on my bedroom wall, so it should be with my other pictures frames etc. Wouldn’t that be awesome to dress him in that much used, much blessed little dress? No hurry as he is still too small for it-ha.
I can’t express the calmness and joy I feel when holding and feeding Michael. It is as if for that short time I feel completely “whole” “at One with the Universe” He looks at me and I don’t see a baby but rather my savior ,my God. It is all so profound, words cannot begin to explain ….. All these years I have fought the concept that a person, any human person, could “complete” me: Certainly no man ever could or even my genuine love for Heather, or my precious Laney, but for an hour or so a day, I do feel that “wholeness”. What a gift!
Yet, and this is the part that is hard to describe, I am perfectly willing to let him go to his extended family to live and grow up , if that is what God wills for him. I feel such an unselfish love for him and respect for his battle to live when the odds were against him, that I don’t want to do anything to mess up his “mission” in this life, hopefully I will only enhance it.

Enough about my “love” for Baby Michael, let me tell about some of the other Love that has been pouring out on me recently: As I have mentioned I became very close to three students( two of whom were pictured in the previous blog and the third in this one. All three are My "Dancing Angels" as they performed the "Praise You Father" Dance at Mass several weeks ago).They have recently graduated from Nursing School and have gone back to the villages where they are from. I love them each individually and couldn’t ‘choose” if I had to. Robina, Juliet and Suzy (the three girls who did the “Praise You Father” dance on my blogs are remarkable young women ,bright and funny and each has a heart as big as Texas.

They send me wonderful text messages that continue to brighten my day , like “Tomorrow, look outside: It is so pleasant! The sun will be smiling for you, the birds will be singing for you, trees dancing for you because I ask them to wish you a nice day. Good nite and I miss you”

Another reads “’’’’’’This’’’ is God’s Rain’’’’’of ‘’’Blessings. May every drop bring you joy, peace and love of JESUS! Thank you so much for all you have done and all you’ve been and everything. Till we meet again—luv you sweetheart”

A third reads ”To share joy is to show love ,to show love is to do good and to do good is to spread happiness. Thanks for everything, all was so great! Goodnight, God bless you”..
Another reads “It is a nice feeling when you know that someone loves you, misses you and needs you , but it feels much better when you know that someone will never forget you, that is me. Pray for us, dear”

And the last one is “ Suddenly if today you smile and feel good and you are not quite sure why…It might have something to do with the big HUG I just sent your way”.

These wonderful text messages started long before they left and the first one from Suzie has a funny story atttached to it.
It read” Friends are gifts wrapped in a ribbon of love, trimmed with care, given to us by God, to stay, not just for a day but forever. You will always be treasured. Love you and miss you dear.” Well I so appreciated the message, I chose to forward it to some friends, as text messages are fairly cheap for me to send from here to USA. I sent one to my friend Michele in Pa. Because I have not had any contact with her in forever (she doesn’t do email) and she text messaged back “ HOW TRUE! Who is this?” I am still laughing when I think of it. Ha! In any case we did finally connect and hopefully will more frequently in the future.

Another young person in my life, who seems to find me worthy of his caring heart, is Emmanuel (or Emma for short ). It took me forever to call a guy Emma, but now it seems quite natural. He owns the local DVD- Video Store, fixes computers etc while he attends college in Kampala for advanced studies in Computer Tech. Emma , like the nursing students is only in his twenties but for reasons I can’t explain enjoys my company. Presently he is in Kampala at school (comes back and forth every so often) and the Queen of England is in Kampala on a much awaited visit., this country has been preparing for- for over a year. Some big political ballyhoo of many countries, that she is to facilitate and I know little about. It is called CHOGUM, which stands for something but in essence means” Queen Elizabeth is coming to town”. Emma’s text message today reads “Morning my Chogum, extend my greetings to Prince Michael, have a blessed day” . Must say, I’ve never been called anyones Chogum before-ha, though Baby Michael is certainly the Prince who has stole my heart. -------------------------------------------------------------------------Dinner for 4 in my home and Marie and Maria embrace


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It is all very exciting and I feel honored to be a part of this process. Between caring for Baby Michael, doing Outreaches, an occasional Home visit and frequent visits from my pt and new friend Maria Goretti, as well as remaining active on the Quality Assurance Team for ARV’s (though I have retired from being Chairperson-smile) and my regular job giving Immunizations to the many babies that come into Public Health daily, it is no wonder that I have lost some 30 pounds of unneeded fat-Ha.
In the beginning I lost weight because I couldn’t find food I liked but now I think it is ALL the walking I do every day.. In America we are so used to hoping into our car and driving every where (even to the mailbox) but here it is only shoe leather that gets me around, except once a week when I hire a car to drive me to Kisoro to shop and use the
Internet Café, which is what I am about to do right now.
My helper Grace has been busy with her own personal issues as well as caring for her aging grandmother, but she did find time to till the soil and plant all the vegetable seeds my friends have sent. It will be fun to see what grows as she didn’t mark anything-ha. Maybe by March when friends come for holiday, I’ll have a garden full of lettuce, radishes, beans, cauliflower and who know what.
O, I almost forgot to tell you…… dear friend Bert Self, husband of my precious friend Becky who died last Feb. 24th, is coming here to visit, spending Christmas with me in Uganda! Jonathan, their amazing son encouraged his Dad to take the trip of a lifetime and he has been traveling thru China and Tibet, even teaching English as a second language in China. I can’t wait for his arrival and to hear all the stories of his adventures. He insists he can get here from Entebbe, Kampala Airport himself and I guess if he has been backpacking thru China and Tibet , he’ll do just fine.
Also joining me for my first Christmas in Uganda will be Diana Sherrod, my fellow missionary and possible Trish, an Australian nurse working with Diana.
I shall do my best to create an American-Ugandan Christmas we’ll never forget, even if I have to chop down a cherry tree myself (O, that’s another holiday, silly me). I have a live Turkey with my name on it, just waiting for Christmas dinner. Trust me it will look a lot more like what I am used to seeing by the time I start to cook it on Christmas-smile. I even asked Carol Balderree to send me a large container of Stove Top Stuffing, so it will really feel like home. Don’t know where to get lights to put on the ”cherry” tree but I expect they will come out of the woodwork ,like all the other blessing that come my way.

Gotta run, take formula to Michael (they do not have refrigeration in the hospital) , then off to Kisoro to shop and send this to you..
--------------------------Much love and many blessings from Uganda
----------------------------------Missionary Marie.

Me on my first "outreach" to do HIV Rapid Finger stick Testing