From America to Uganda to Ireland and so forth

Dear Friends ------------------------------------------------------------Jan. 21, 2009

Not sure what kind of a blog this will make as my emotions all over the place today; I woke yesterday (the 20th) at 6:30 am and sat bolt upright in my bed, as if someone had shook me awake. My first coherent thoughts were not of the soon to be inaugurated President Barack Obama, but strangely enough of my grandmother, my father’s mother Brigid McGee, who I had never met, as she had passed away, as had all my grandparents before my arrival into this world..
I had never known much about my grandmother until only months before my own father’s death, when he shared many stories of his youth in Ireland prior to his families coming to America when he was 13 years old.
It was only then I found out how much I was like my grandmother, as, apparently, she had been the midwife and village nurse, as well as the undertaker, preparing the bodies of friends and neighbors for burial. All this while raising a family of 10 children, along with her husband, my grandfather, Patrick McGee.
OK, so what does this have to do with anything? Yesterday (and today as well) is a bit of a puzzle that is still in the process of being put together piece by piece.
As I started my day, I recalled a rather innocuous dream I had about my sister and niece Jolie, but yet felt oddly disturbed by it. That remains one of the pieces of the puzzle that has yet to find it’s place in this convoluted mosaic called my life(smile).
Since I had awakened early I attended mass at 7:10 with special prayers said by Fr. John Vianney for Barack Obama, who noted that Obama’s father was from East Africa (Kenya) , as we are in Uganda.. I felt singular to be an American and I proudly displayed my Obama buttom all day long, as I eagerly awaited 7pm to view the Inauguration from Dr. Damian’s and Waltrauds home.------ Yet, the nagging uneasiness persisted , thru what should have been a carefree lighthearted day., including a birthday gathering for Carolyn, the wife of a visiting surgeon from Holland, as well as several friends joining us as we savored each glorious moment of the Inauguration of the 44th President of the United States of America.!

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I know I have already shared the wonderful experience I had with watching the election results on Nov. 4th : being the token American amidst friends from Germany ,Holland , England and Uganda. But as grand as that was, this was even better.. The excitement in the room was palpable. Everyone less interested in what Michelle Obama was wearing than actually hearing every word of President Barack Obama’s speech . We were all impressed with the music, the poetry, the speeches, but when President Barack was in view, all eyes, all ears were attuned to him, just him.
My favorite memory is when the master of ceremonies announced “Please all stand for –such and such--." Everyone (including me) in the room where I was, also stood . It was very impressive and poignant, the respect my friends here in Uganda , showed for this ceremony. I truly believe it was Barack Obama himself that elicited this response. It was above and beyond his typical charisma , this was the stature of greatness and we all felt it.
As I readied to leave that evening (we are 9 hours ahead of the States) they started to sing the National Anthem. How could I walk out when those from other countries stood respectfully at attention?, So with more feeling than I have ever felt while singing the Star Spangled Banner , with hand over my heart and tears in my eyes, I sang “For the land of the free and the home of the brave”.
Yes, I am happy to be serving the people of Uganda as a Lay Mission Helper, but I have never been more proud or grateful to be a citizen of The United States of America!


Still feeling a bit disturbed by waking so abruptly this AM , following strange dreams, I took time to pray and meditate (talk to and listen) to My Beloved Creator, requesting perhaps a little sense of peace before nodding off to sleep. As I tried to still my very active mind, I was filled with thoughts of a sweet baby pt. in the Pediatric Ward named Bridget (no, I did not name her after my grandmother Brigid, she arrived to St. Francis Hospital with that name already-smile). She had been with us for 8 days and was becoming weaker every day. Only 3 mo. old with a tentative diagnosis of Meningitis she was too weak to nurse, so was being fed via an NG tube. I had noted that her heart beat was irregular but seemed unable to get anyone to listen to what I had to say. That is not uncommon but at least when Dr. Ssenyojo was here, he would follow up on a pt. when I had a specific concern. Now, there is no Dr. assigned to the Pediatric Ward and there will not be one until March when Dr. Louie arrives from the States. I had sent several text messages to the Clinical Officer (like Nurse Practitioner) covering the Ward, but had no personal response, only a note on her chart that the irregular heart beat had been noted..
I prayed for this little soul and her dear Mama and made the connection between thoughts of my Irish Grandmother and this little soul that I felt would soon be joining her namesake in the heavens.

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Now the pieces of the puzzle of my chaotic day were finding their place: sitting up bolt-like at 6:30am, attending Mass, remembering dreams of my sister, niece and mother, celebrating the Inauguration of President Barack Obama with friends from other lands, taking the dolls to the tailor who need clothes (or perhaps added coverings) before being gifted to the AIDS Orphans next Sat., the 31st. All this plus working in the morning at Public Health. I had given up the afternoon in the Peds Ward to attend to other more pressing things. And to be perfectly honest, I couldn’t bear to see if Baby Bridget had gotten any worse, mostly because I felt my efforts to communicate her condition left me powerless to help her.
I was then led to an interpretation of Psalm 25 by Fr. William J O’Malley, which reads:

--------------God, shame is a gift I really never requested.
==========The sins of my youth, surely ,I paid for long ago----
==========as if payment could expunge a slight to one like you.
==========If anything, I have been humble, aware of my hedging.
==========too aware, too aware---to the point of paralysis.

==========If the benighted are to find light,
========== let them open their eyes!
========== If the crippled will walk,
==========let them start by crawling!
==========If the fainthearted are to love,
==========let them first give trust.

That is where I had gone wrong: I had not “trusted” that God was in charge! I had approached the day, even my fretful dreams, as if I were in charge. As if it were my personal responsibility to save Baby Bridget’s life, make every baby and mother feel loved and special, dress the naked dolls and personally come-up with another 15 gifts for the older girls (not enough dolls for every Orphan). I am surprised I didn’t think I should “personally” swear in Barack Obama as President of the United States, as well as give the Invocation, sing “My Country Tis of Thee” (certainly I’d out-shine Aretha Franklin-smile)’
No I had not trusted that God had the “Whole World in His Hands” and my job was not as decision maker but rather to allow my very human hands and heart to be used as He saw fit..

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I close with my prayer for President Obama and his cabinet and all of us that he has has elicited to share with him the struggles that lay ahead---------from Alfred Lord Tennyson, ”Ulysses”
======Though much is taken, much abides; and though
======We are not now that strength, which in old days
======Moved earth and heavens, that which we are, we are----
======One equal temper of heroic hearts,
======Made weak by time and fate, but strong in will
======To strive, to seek, to find, and not to yield.

------------GOD BLESS AMERICA (and Uganda and Holland and Germany and Baby Bridget too!)
----------------------------------Marie

ps : Sadly, on Wed., I found that Baby Bridget had joined my grandmother Brigid and President Obama’s beloved grandmother and all the Communion of Saints, at exactly 6:30am, the 20th, the moment I bolted upright in my bed. May her angel soul rest in peace!