Tears Of Hope

Maria’s Story Continues : July 29, 2007

I was not the only one facing such stories of inheritance. Many women had returned from Rwanda with no hope of ever going back because their husbands were either dead or missing. The authorities, I learnt had handled several similar cases before mine. Maria yawns and stretches her arms behind her head.

“Maria, you look tired. Do you need some rest?” I ask her. “Yes, I think I need to lie down for a short while, I feel sleepy. I told you I did not sleep very well last night. I hope you don’t mind.? ” No, I don’t I assured her ”We’ll take a break and continue later..

After sleeping for about an hour Maria calls out “Come, let us finish. I slept longer than I intended but I feel better now.” Slims is such a bad disease, it does not allow me to work much these days. I get tired easily, I depend more on the children to do most of the work. I used to have months of respite, sometimes as much as six months of respite, but not anymore. I suppose the disease is growing. Without TASO (The AIDS Support Organization) life would be very difficult.

“Tell me a little bit about TASO and what help do you get?” “TASO helps people suffering from Slim (AIDS). It employs good people who teach us how to look after ourselves, what to eat and how not to infect other people. I told you I did not breast feed my daughter. TASO people provided the milk I gave her for a long time. They taught me how to mix it and how to feed her. Even after I left the hospital, they continued to bring the milk and check on me at home. The got to understand the home situation and the problems I was facing. Besides giving me foodstuffs like sugar, beans, cooking oil and maize flour, TASO staff regularly bring me soap and some little money to buy paraffin and food. I sell the oil, some of the soap and some of the sugar .My children like bushera, a sweet drink made from sorghum, it does not need sugar. We do not need all the soap and as for cooking oil, we do not use much of it.

TASO also pays my medical bills and teaches us how to prepare out children to manage on their own when we die.

Even before this free education (referring to Universal Primary Education, known as UPE in short) was introduced, my children did not pay school fees. So you see why I am so grateful to TASO.

“You know with this disease I get hungry a lot. I need to eat a little but often. You are spoiling me with a flask of tea besides me like the wife of a chief. May I take some”

“Of course, it is all yours. You can continue the story as you take the tea. ”I tell her

“I was talking about my brother and the property before I slept. The property was divided, I got a piece of land and part of the banana plantation. I also got Maama’s house but as I told you, my brother had repaired it poorly and refused to repair it again when it collapsed. He was bitter that I had gotten some of the property. His wife’s attitude became even more hostile, but I ignored them as much as possible. Fortunately at the time, I was not very weak. I had enjoyed about two months of strength. I had even managed to work in people’s garden to earn some money. With this money I bought timber and paid men to repair the house. I made sure it was done well, not like the way my brother had done. I wanted to show him and his cruel wife that I was not living at their mercy.

The house stands strong even now. It has become another source of dispute between my brother’s family and me.

“The piece of land and plantation, I got as my share, continued to eat away at my brother and his wife. They continued to be nasty to me and this disturbed me a great deal I knew with this sickness, I could die at any time I did not want to leave the children with relatives full of hatred. I wanted so much to be friends with my brother and his family.

One day I called to him. We sat alone and talked. He is not really bad, he is only weak and allows himself to be controlled by his wife. She poisons his mind against me I said to him ”Child of my mother, you see I am sick and that my sickness is not the kind that gets cured. I am in and out of the hospital all the time. One time it will be my body that is brought home Tell me brother, when I die, will you take care of my orphans?”

“He did not hesitate, but answered straightway “I will never mix my children with children of foreign blood. I will not have Banyarwanda on my father’s land.

“What will you do, send them out into the cold?” I asked him. “They will go back to their country, their relatives”.

“But you know what happened in that country. They would not know where to go.

They would not find any of their people. They are either dead or scattered to other lands as refugees in other countries.”

“That is not my problem. I don’t want your son’s on my children’s property.” He concluded with finality.

“Then I asked him that supposing my children lived on another property, and not this one, would he care for them once I was gone?” “I am not asking you to feed or dress them”, I added. “Suffering has made them mature beyond their years. They are able to fend for themselves, but without me, they would need an adult to guide them. Would you be an uncle to them? Someone they could turn to for help and advice? Would you receive them as children?”

To be continued………..credits to Winnie Munyarugerero for compiling Maria’s story

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