Tears of Hope

Marie and Maria-the friendship strengthens

Maria’s story continues: July 18, 2007

I was at first shocked when I was told I had Slims Disease (AIDS) as my late husband was not a man who chased after woman. As for me, I had not known any other man sexually. I was angry and felt betrayed but later, as the same nurse talked with me some more, I learnt to accept my condition and not to look for anyone to blame. My baby was taken care of by the staff at TASO ( The AIDS Support Organization ). I was too sick to do much. TASO paid for all my hospital bills. I am so grateful
When I left the hospital, I was still weak. My brother came to take me home. I noticed from the beginning that his wife was not happy to see me. She had not been to the hospital to see me even once. I could also see that my children were not happy. It was obvious that the woman has treated them very badly, but I was still too weak to do anything about it.
My parents’ house was old. It had recently collapsed. By the time I returned, therefore, I had no house to return to. The children and I had to squeeze into my brother’s house with his wife and their three children .It was difficult. My sister-in-law harassed us constantly. She blamed the children for everything that went wrong in the home. It was so bad that my eldest son threatened to run away at one time. She took advantage of my being weak to beat me up sometimes: One time she found me sleeping at night and pushed me off the bed to the floor. It is a wonder I did not break any bones. Other times, whenever my brother was not at home, she would throw me out of the house with the little infant. I would then spend the night out in the open.
A time came when I could not take any more of her cruelty. There she was sauntering like a queen ,to where I lay. She stood above me and looked down on me as if I was nothing. I looked up at her and kept quiet. She started, as usual, to pour abuse on me. I was still weak at the time but her taunts got to me. A wave of anger lifted me from the bed and I stood facing her, ready to fight. Then I noticed a pestle lying nearby, where my son had placed it after pounding sorghum. I snatched it up and, with a kind of strength I did not know I possessed, brought it down. I missed her head by a split second. The bitch is young and strong and agile as a cat, instead I got her elbow as she scampered out. For a good three weeks her hand was swollen and lame. It straightened later after treatment, but she has been scared of me since that day.” She only abuses me from a distance”, Maria stops almost out of breath.
“What did your brother do about all this mistreatment? I chip in. “He did not intervene. He did not wish to offend his wife. He was blind to everything. But the neighbors were not blind, they became concerned. What shocked them the most was when they learnt that I was sometimes forced to sleep out in the cold with a very young baby. The L.C. (Local Council ) leaders of the village intervened They believed my sister-in- law tortured me because she wanted the children and me out of her house. They, therefore, ordered my brother to repair Mama’s house for me to move into. We moved in but the repair work was so shoddy that the house collapsed again in no time at all.
Meanwhile, the abuse by my sister-in-law continues. Moving out of her house did not seem to make too much difference. She said I had no business being around there. She wanted me to go back to Rwanda, where my home and property were. It did not matter to her that my husband was dead and his people were either dead or in exile.
One day during one of the sessions at TASO, I shared my problem with the group members. One woman told me about the office in Kisoro town that helps woman with legal problems. She told me how she had gotten help when the relative from her dead husband wanted to grab her land from her. She directed me to the office. I did not know Kisoro town well. It had grown very large during the years I lived in Rwanda. I asked around and eventually found the office.
At the office a young woman welcomed me. She told me she was a lawyer. I narrated my story to her and she listened intently. She wrote down everything I told her. She asked me many questions. I answered them truthfully. I explained that my brother and his wife did not want me to have a share of my father’s property. She assured me that I was as much my parents child as my brother was, therefore, entitled to a share of their property.. She then wrote a letter and gave it to me to take to the L.C. Chairman of our village She also wrote other letters to other important people She promised that my problem would be handled soon. Indeed, not long after my visit to the office the Chairman LC2, the Probation officer and the LC 1 Executive Committee held a meeting at our home with my brother and me. They ordered that our parents’ property should be divided equally between my brother and me. Any property bought by my brother was his and I could not claim any of it. Only what belonged to our dead parents was to be divided.

To be continued…………….. .